Fred – I had the pleasure of knowing Fred for about 3 to 4 days a year over a 25 year period. Of the many words which spring to mind about Fred enigmatic keeps coming to the top of my list. He had a wit which would follow you around for weeks. After spending a few days around Fred I often found myself laughing aloud at what he’d said or how he construed a situation. He had that rare type of humor which rose from a palpable creativity – his ability to look at the world afresh was a true gift.
In recalling the many funny and fun-filled times, Fred stories are always unique and surprising. When I was struggling to describe him to my British wife the best I could do was to say Fred was like the Hunter S Thompson of Neuropsychology. But Fred had a deeply compassionate side. I can remember walking with him in downtownSeattleand he was like a local celebrity, but not with cappuccino crowd, no with the homeless and disabled people living on the streets. Several times that morning he subtly handed cash to this person or that, obviously in need. No doubt he may have treated many of them but his St Jude-like presence was unmistakable, his compassion obvious.
Fred had a unique way of being undercover with his tender caring side. He loved to portray himself as a wild man without scruples but this playful ruse was nothing but sham. For instance, Fred seldom made a show of talking about his relationship with his boys but on the one visit I made to his home nearSeattle, it was so obvious he knew his young sons much better than most dads and his playful nature struck an affectionate chord with them both. Oh, and Fred was the only dad I’ve ever known who laid on top of his son to protect him from a marauding Grizzly bear!
Fred had a detachment which was rare. A small group of us each year in Feb at INS would catch up on our lives. During some of those years when I’d see him and was lamenting one of my life’s dramas, he had way of helping me see that my suffering was an illusion of my own making. Of course anyone can tell you these truths but Fred would tell you with that smirk which said “it’s your trip but if I were navigating!” I think he lived that detachment which is both enlightening and enriching without the slightest reference or illusion to it.
Fred’s intellect was striking. He often brought a razor sharp analysis to a paper or a poster we had heard together. His thoughts would, as often as not, be peppered with humor and irony. He was self-effacing about his knowledge and skills but I suspect that his very keen intellect was the explanation for his success as an expert witness. Although I never watched him court, I strongly suspect that lawyers found him very difficult throw off course or off balance.
Our modern lives are so strange in so many ways. Most of my time with Fred was a friendship devoted learning in the day and enjoyment at night then emails through the year. But I counted those times when a small group of us would sit and recap our year’s histories as sacrosanct and exceptional moments in a world of deadlines and duties. We may have regaled and recanted the zany and mapcap times but they were rooted in a unique camaraderie among friends who appreciated each other’s unique spirit and none more than Fred’s – Goodbye dear old friend.